The Infamous Duo...

Justin Burnett / The Whidbey Examiner
Despite their differences, Lily, a six-month-old Labrador retriever, and Tipper, a three-year-old Pygmy goat, are the best of friends. The two occasionally get into trouble however, as they seem to enjoy visiting their neighbors.


Justin Burnett / The Whidbey Examiner
Lily chases her best bud Tipper around the yard of their Morris Road home.

Unusual friendship is a recipe for neighborhood misadventures

By Justin Burnett
Examiner Staff Writer

Ever since Lily came into the picture, Tipper's life just hasn't been the same. Not only does she have a new best friend, but she also seems to end up in a whole lot more trouble than she used to.

Perhaps it's because Lily is a six-month-old Labrador that's as curious and rambunctious as they get. Or perhaps it's because three-year-old Tipper sometimes forgets she is a Pygmy goat.

"Tipper thinks she's a dog," said owner Kelly Smith, who lives near Coupeville. "She's supposed to be a fainting goat, but nothing really scares her. She even walks on a leash."

And even though Lily tends to be the ringleader, Tipper isn't exactly innocent, Smith said with a laugh. Like most Pygmy goats, she has a troublemaking streak of her own and it doesn't take much for the unlikely duo to end up in a misadventure like they did a few weeks ago.

For reasons that are still unclear, early one Sunday morning the two apparently decided against playing their favorite games of 'dog chases goat' and 'goat rams the dog.' Instead, they opted to go on a little expedition beyond the boundaries of their Morris Road home.

"They just decided they wanted to go off an adventure," Smith said.

What they did or where went over the next few hours, only Lily and Tipper know for sure. What is known where they ended up later that afternoon - about a quarter mile away at the home of Dave Fish and Karen Fletcher.

Fletcher said she was relaxing inside the house when one of her granddaughters came running in with an odd bit of news: There was a goat and a dog coming over for a visit! But sure enough, when she went outside to take a look, there were Lily and Tipper, walking confidently down Harrington Road.

"There they were, both just walking along," Fletcher said.

Lily and Tipper are some of the friendliest animals around, so it didn't take long for Fletcher's granddaughters, 12-year-old twins Cassidy and Chandler Fish, to fall hopelessly in love with them.

"The goat thinks she's a dog and the dog thinks she's a goat," Fletcher said. "It's really adorable."

When Fletcher decided to take Lily to the nearby Whidbey Animals Improvement Foundation shelter to see if she had an imbedded electronic identification ship, Tipper baaaaaaed her objections at being left behind.

"I wasn't going to put a goat in my car," Fletcher said, shaking her head.

Lily wasn't gone long, however, as she did not have an identification chip. Realizing both animals would need to spend the night, and feeling it wouldn't be right to tie them up, a makeshift enclosure was set up in Fletcher's yard.

Meanwhile, Smith and his girlfriend Rachel Warner had been frantically searching the neighborhood for the odd couple. They were happily reunited the next day after Fletcher got a call from the county, informing her of Lily and Tipper's real owners.

"Lily has run off before and always come back," Warner said. "But that was the first time the goat took off, and it scared me."

Lark Gustafson, a veterinarian at Penn Cove Veterinary Clinic, said the two adventurers shouldn't be judged too harshly. They are just doing what comes naturally. Lily has an instinct to roam, and Tipper is a herd animal whose instinctively stays with her companion. Even though under other circumstances they might consider each other predator and prey, it's not all that uncommon for domesticated animals to form such unlikely friendships.

"You see that from time to time," Gustafson said.

But Tipper the pygmy goat may be part canine after all. One week after her adventure with Lily, she was back at Fletcher's house for another visit, and this time she was all by herself.

"We took the dogs out, and she decided she wanted to go out, too," Smith said.



See the article here: http://www.whidbeyexaminer.com/main.asp?Search=1&ArticleID=1590&SectionID=3&SubSectionID=3&S=1

Seriously... Seriously.

I could wring me some necks here. Three men, three weeks. All cheating. Who knows how many aren't caught? For those lucky ones who are still somehow able to keep from being found out, if you are seriously too cowardly to just own up to the fact that you're not man enough to stick it out, consider these pointers:

1) Erase your shit from your cell phone. Dumb ass. This includes pictures, texts, phone records, videos, etc., etc., etc. I shouldn't have to tell you this.

2) Don't tell people about your exploits. This increases the number of people who know. You'd think this might be obvious.

3) Log off your internet sessions, moron. If you've got your girlies contacting you on your IM, TURN IT OFF when you're done. Dumb ass. If you're on dating sites, erase your history. And your temporary internet files. But then, if you're stupid enough to do it in the first place, you're probably too stupid to consider these factors.

And lastly, go to hell.

7/29/08: And lastly again... No, this doesn't have anything to do with Kelly, for those who have expressed concern. We're great. =) We still love eachother, like, a lot.

Dearest Little Maddie

Precious little Madeline Lester died just a little over 6 months ago, today. I was just reading the letters from Dave and Cindy to their little one in heaven. I can hardly see the words I type now as the tears fall... I haven't talked to Dave in Cindy in so long... Yet I think about them all the time. What do you say to people who have just lost the most beautiful thing in their life? There's been so many others who are so much closer to them... I feel that my words might seem empty and void, not having been that close to them in the past few years. Anyhow... all that is not what I meant to say... I don't really know what to say, except that I ache for them. I cry for them more often than I thought I would and I'm sure more often then they think I do. I can't even imagine the ripping pain that losing your little girl would cause. I look at Ava and the thought of her not being there is unbearable. I don't think I could handle it. I don't know how they do. I can imagine that you would be forever changed. Dearest little Ava, I love you so much. I always wish I better... what mom doesn't. I hope that I can be half the mom you deserve. Dear little Maddie... Thank you for all that you've done and all the hearts you've touched in your short three years. Thank you for showing me how much more I need to love those that I have now.

Dear Psycho-Betty

We wanted to let you know that we will not be helping you any further with your fence. When we agreed to help you it was out of kindness, as a good-faith gesture towards becoming amicable neighbors. However, we do not believe this is possible any longer. We feel that you have become demanding, unreasonable and, honestly, quite ridiculous in your expectations.

Until we received your letter we had no knowledge of the trouble that Lily had caused. We agree that Lily should not have been in your yard and when we became aware of her troublesome visits we penned and leashed her so that she no longer has any freedom. Upon receiving your letter we tried to make amends through a note of apology and a gift of some plants, thinking this might be a gift that you would like. Yet, even after making reasonable amends we still acquiesced and agreed to help you fortify this fence, though it was now an unnecessary measure as Lily is permanently confined.

Perhaps, being retired, you do not realize that as a young, working mother I have a fairly busy life. Just because I am able to manage some of my workload from home does not mean that my life is full of free time and has no schedule. I am partner in a very busy construction firm that demands quite a lot from me. I offered to help you in the time frame that was workable with my schedule, however, that was not acceptable to you as you wanted it done in your time. I would have helped you while Ava naps each day, but again, this was not acceptable. You mentioned that you thought I should bring Ava with me to your home for the remaining hours that it would take to finish your fence. To expect me to take a two year old to your home and have her busy herself for hours at a time while I try to dig a trench and erect a fence is preposterous. You stated that we were expected to perform this work in your yard, during your time frame, as YOU were being kind in helping US erect YOUR fence. I think you are sorely mistaken as to whom was being kind to whom in the building of this fence. Our responsibility is to keep our animal in our yard. Work that you want done to your yard is your responsibility.

In closing, neither Kelly nor I prefer to spend our time working with you any longer. Again, this was originally offered as a gesture of good-will, however you have displayed a misguided sense of entitlement and a twisted sense of other's social responsibilities while your own social awareness, not to mention basic kindness, is severely lacking.

Please do not contact us any further regarding this matter.

Thank you,

Kelly Smith and Rachel Warner






Oh, Snap.

Bella Vida

Do you ever just have one of those days where life is so overwhelmingly beautiful that it actually hurts? It's not perfect, of course, but even the imperfections are beautiful little threads woven into a larger picture, adding character and a bit of the unexpected. And perhaps the imperfect things that aren't beautiful are at least tolerable... Like bad little doggies and psycho-self-absorbed-with-too-large-a-sense-of-entitlement neighbors like the one we've come to know, not so affectionately, as Psycho-Betty. But today is too wonderful to talk about her... I shall save that story for tomorrow.

Today I am absolutely in love with my family.

Our little Ava is being a darling, and we're having a fun day full of cheerios, puzzles and musica. (Known also as "seeka" in the wee world.) Watching a little blonde haired, blue eyed kid "speaking" spanish is pretty darn cute. I never knew before I had her that you could be so in love with your child.

Kelly is truly the greatest love of my life... some reasons known only to us and some are completely obvious to everyone who knows him. I am so overwhelmingly in love with that boy.

I also love the pattern that my life has finally fallen into. After living like a gitana for so long, having a real life schedule is sooooo wonderful. Of course, my schedule pretty much consists of doing whatever I want 5 days a week, and working for two. You really can't beat it.

Super excited because I wanted to start Belly Dancing again and it just so happens that the class I used to take in Port Orchard is now on Wednesday evenings... the one evening I happen to be in Port Orchard, so Gwen and I are returning. Did I mention that I am super excited! It's been a good two years since I've danced... Let's hope I haven't lost it all...

Sara, dear dear overly pregnant Sara, finally had Elsa! At 9 lbs, 4 oz, you know she was overdue. Elsa is a sweet, quiet little darling and I know her parents are thrilled. Oh, and Happy Birthday Sara!

And Vanessa, I am so glad to have you as my friend. Even though I never ever see you, I consider you one of the closest friends I have and am so happy that someone understands me so well. I will never judge you for being intelligent or busy. I am also truly cursed. ;)

And Gwen... you know I'm excited. And I won't say why. :D

Our goat has made us famous...

Apparently the Island is enthralled by adorable rogue puppy/goat duos. The newspaper came by today to shoot the photos for the article. When it comes out I'll post it here.

Kels is sick. Again. Perhaps a diet of Taco Bell, Mountain Dew and Coors Lite (not necessarily in that order) is NOT the healthiest option. I might have to start buying him Flinstone vitamins... Ava likes 'em. I don't know what to do with the poor boy. He's hardly moved from couch in three days. He's actually stayed home more than the time he had, and subsequently hospitalized me and Ava with, Influenza A. This time Ava has infected him. They are now even. I'm saving mine up for something good... like cancer or head lice. But in the mean time I am being nice and making chicken noodle soup and pumping him full of vitamin c. Poor baby...

I still do not like my psycho-betty neighbor. I know Jesus says to love thy neighbor, but obviously Jesus never met psycho-betty. Her parting comment to me when I left her house after nearly two hours on my knees digging a 30' trench 10" deep was "If I'm not here tomorrow you know what's going on now, you can just come get started yourself!". Think so biotch? Think again. I no-showed. What is she going to do? Never talk to me again? If only I was so lucky... Maybe she'll die soon. Maybe she'll drown in the pond that Lily keeps "destroying" that takes her "hours to rebuild". Maybe she's on frickin crack because "the pond" is actually a little pre-molded fountain in the ground not 2' in diameter and maybe 15" deep. Frickin idiot-crack-head-psycho-betty-biotch.

I'm not bitter.

The Tale of the Prodigal Dog and the Lemming Goat

Quick version. I hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate Lily.

Long Version: Yesterday around 1 we notice that said hated Lily and my beloved goat were no where to be found. Ironic since I had just told Lily to run away and get eaten not 2 hours earlier, however because she took my goat I resorted to trying to find her. Sadly I was successful and Animal Control said that they had, in fact, received a call of a puppy/goat duo. Figuring there weren't too many I went and retrieved them. I hugged the goat. I kicked Lily. I kicked Lily again when I was trying to insert the goat into the back of my Trailblazer and Lily tried to eat goat's back leg, causing her to almost kick me. Therefore the kick was passed to Lily and we went on our merry way. In closing, I hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate that dog. We are getting her an invisible fence and I am setting the collar to "Stun".

In other "reasons to hate Lily" news... I have to go help our nutjob neighbor rebuild a freakin fence because that &$%*ing dog won't stop tearing through it. I don't even like that &$%*ing dog, why do *I* have to do it? I might have to kick her a few extra times for this.

Oh Wow...

Yesterday was a sad day for many people that I know... it was a sad, sad day where many tears were shed. Three different sets of people that I know well... Bad things happen in threes I guess...

It just makes me ever more grateful for my beautiful life. I'm sure I'm undeserving... thank God for grace. I really, really love you Kelly. Thank you for being my safe place and being strong and constant. I don't know what I'd do with out you.