The Tale of the Prodigal Dog and the Lemming Goat

Quick version. I hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate Lily.

Long Version: Yesterday around 1 we notice that said hated Lily and my beloved goat were no where to be found. Ironic since I had just told Lily to run away and get eaten not 2 hours earlier, however because she took my goat I resorted to trying to find her. Sadly I was successful and Animal Control said that they had, in fact, received a call of a puppy/goat duo. Figuring there weren't too many I went and retrieved them. I hugged the goat. I kicked Lily. I kicked Lily again when I was trying to insert the goat into the back of my Trailblazer and Lily tried to eat goat's back leg, causing her to almost kick me. Therefore the kick was passed to Lily and we went on our merry way. In closing, I hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate that dog. We are getting her an invisible fence and I am setting the collar to "Stun".

In other "reasons to hate Lily" news... I have to go help our nutjob neighbor rebuild a freakin fence because that &$%*ing dog won't stop tearing through it. I don't even like that &$%*ing dog, why do *I* have to do it? I might have to kick her a few extra times for this.